Every day, I learn a little more about what life is and how monetarily consumptive it can be. It seems as though each morning I wake up, I feel dramatically different in comparison to how I did the day before; sometimes for the better, but more often for the worse. Today, however, I decided that I love hating my life. The more increasingly bitter I become, the happier I feel as a result. Hating everything around me has seemed to trigger an energetic burst of joy that stays fueled so long as I continue to hate. The more judgmental, rude, and cruel I can be, the better my life becomes. Everybody else around me are just casualties at this point, I’m on a roll. Since the bout of poor luck ended, my confidence rose to an unnaturally high level. This is what it feels like when you’ve earned one hundred lives in Super Mario World, so life consequentially ceases to matter and you can die as many times as you desire without facing any of the consequences. This is what it feels like after accomplishing a very illegal operation without coming even remotely close to being caught. Hitting a Mercedes and driving away feels very similar to this, but is much more frightening. Finding twenty dollars and keeping it. Topping out your car without worrying about it exploding. Mission: point convey. Status: assessed. I have to work tonight at the Rivercity complex, and I still feel golden. Hello mania, goodbye low.

I have downloaded twenty three of the forty five gbs of music I lost when my external hard drive crashed. In a week, my library will be restored and enhanced.

~ by j9valjean on June 6, 2008.